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Friends Only.
Don't need my family up in my business.
Even if it is complete nonsense.
Banner by [profile] zaganuk
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I went from infuriated to accomplished within a few hours. It started around 8:30pm, when I left to Patterson, New Jersey to attend my cousin's birthday.

My mom was really set on going to my cousin's birthday ever since my aunt called and claimed that it was Saturday even though she said it was Sunday two days before. I was steaming with anger when my mom started screaming out, "Go take a bath and get ready, Marla! You are coming with me."

"Pero Mami, Eduardo no necesita ir! Por que tengo que ir?! No voy hacer algo por aya," I whined to her. I was practically begging saying that my brother didn't have to go. Why did I have to?

"El esta muy cansado. Tu haces nada aqui," countered my mother, saying that I do nothing all day. I did plenty all day! I watched television, did the laundry, and went on the computer. What more could I do? I was tired of her complaining and just repeating the same thing. I just convinced myself, maybe it wouldn't be so bad and boring. And there will be a possiblity of food. So I weighed the good and the bad and just decided to go. I realized later on that maybe my decision wasn't a good a idea.

My mother and I went towards the train station to take the D train all the way to 59th street. When we arrived to the train station my mom told me, "Ask the man how much a ten dollar metrocard costs?" What is wrong with the question? EVERYTHING.

I looked at her and said, "Ma, it's ten dollars." I should have taken this as a foreshadow of events but I just ignored it completely.

We stopped at 59th street and went to Penn Station to take the New Jersey Transit. My mom had NO IDEA OF WHERE SHE WAS GOING. I was just thinking, "Okay, I'll just ask around." But the thing that drove me nuts was my mom's voice. It grew irritable and annoying. She just kept on repeating the same thing over and over and over and over again. I was starting to get so pissed. "I'm NEVER COMING TO New Jersey." I kept saying angrily. I seriously think I was about to scream. I wanted to go home, this was not worth it.

At this point, I was pretty angry. Mother Dear started talking about someone that were talking about us that were near us. I was telling her to tell me who, but she didn't tell me because I was really ready to burst open with anger.

I found out that we had to take Track 9 and switch at some place that starts with a S. A nice lady was speaking to me on the train, but I don't know if I just seemed really pissed because she just stopped talking to me. I'm really sorry about it, but walking around with my mother was frickin' annoying. When the train arrived at S., my mother and I got off. That's when it started. My mom wouldn't SHUT THE HELL UP. I was trying to explain to her how it was going to go down but then she was making me have a panic attack.

"Where are we? We weren't suppose to get off the train. Marla, why did we get off the train? Do you know we weren't suppose to get off the train. Por que nos salimos? Ahora nos vamos a perder."

Like oh my god lady. WHY?! WHY DID YOU QUESTION ME?! You made me panic for no reason when I knew where I was going. I usually have no idea where I'm going since I always have my own guide but this time all I had was my mother dear. I was literally about to burst out crying because I wanted to yell at her but I know I couldn't. And then it was like my memory was wiped clean, I had no idea where I was going. When I was just about to gush out all my tears my savior came.

"Where are you guys going?" a uniformed lady asked my mom and I.

"Pa-Patterson," I stuttered.

"Oh, just go through here and go to track F."

I felt so relieved. My mom continued to bombared me with questions and I was so close to screaming, "SHUT THE HELL UP ALREADY!" but I restrained myself with as much patience I had left. The train took an hour to come which was at 10:28pm. I was already falling asleep and hungry. When the train came, I was so relieved and mounted into it.

"Did we pass our stop? Because I think we did." my mom questioned.

"Ma no we didn't!" I told her certainity.

"Well, I think we did. Nos pasamos."

This lady didn't trust anything I did. I kept on telling her,  "No, we didn't." When Paterson came, I was just about to jump in her face and yell, "YES, I GOT US HERE!" But nope, I didn't, I walked out and went outside the train station to see my aunt, uncle, and cousin all there. I was so relieved to see them, I actually went and gave them big bear hugs. However, the party was over when we got there... at 11:30pm.

I know why I felt so happy. I was glad not to have so much responsibity on my shoulders. I finally didn't have to know where we were going. But as cheesy as it sounds, I actually felt proud of myself when I was done of my journey. I was able to get to our destination and I did it all by myself. No one was there to guide my except those I asked. None of my friends or brothers were there to tell me, "Oh Marla take the blah blah train to blah blah station." I felt more independent and it felt good.


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August 2008

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